Top Financial Questions Newlyweds Ask Advisors

When a couple gets married, there are tons of questions that often come up related to finances. From taxes and property decisions to student loans and estate planning, it’s absolutely normal for newlyweds to ask: “Are we doing this right?”

Neptune spoke with Caitlyn Driehorst, founder and CEO of RightWise Wealth, a financial planning firm that helps modern couples make smart, values-based decisions. Whether you and your spouse are looking to work with a financial advisor to figure out some of these tough money questions or you’re looking to do it yourselves, we’re addressing some of the most common questions newlyweds ask and how prenups and money conversations can lead to stronger, more collaborative relationships.

Q: Should we keep renting, or should we buy a house?

RightWise says: A home can be an appreciating asset or a cash-eating pet. The right answer hinges on timing, down-payment math, and how often Zillow is open on your phone. Many couples skip the first step: dollars aside, do you want to own and maintain a home? It’s probably not a decision you should make based on what boomers tell you you “should” be doing.

Neptune adds: If homeownership is in your near future, a prenup can help set the foundation for how you approach big investments as a couple. A prenup can help clarify how large premarital contributions work and how you might split large expenses - like home ownership - together.

Q: We plan to keep money separate. Is that a problem?

RightWise says: We've spoken to couples who keep every dollar separate ("this means every day we’re actively choosing to be together") and to couples who keep every dollar merged ("this symbolizes that we're on one team") and everything in between. 

The only system we don't recommend? No system. Falling into habits without discussion can create resentment, confusion, stress and concern.

Neptune adds: Keeping finances separate can absolutely work, as long as you’re aligned on how expenses - big or small - are handled. The best thing about a prenup is that it gives you a chance to design a system together.

Q: If we aren't combining our finances, do we have to choose “Married Filing Separately”?

RightWise says: Your tax filing status doesn’t depend on whether you share a checking account. Whether every dollar is in a separate account or whether your finances are completely merged, you could technically file your taxes with either MFJ or MFS since income taxes are driven by income, not assets.

Neptune adds: Keeping your cash together or separate doesn't affect your tax filing status, but it can affect whether your assets are considered separate or marital property -- not only the assets themselves, but also how and what assets you use towards purchases and expenses. A prenup can not only create rules for defining separate and marital assets, but it's also a great education so you can separate or combine assets intentionally.

Q: Joint taxes or married-filing-separately — what’s cheaper?

RightWise says: For most couples, MFJ will provide the best rates, as well as access to deductions not otherwise available. Recent tax code changes have also reduced the "marriage penalty" that hurt dual-income high-earners. That said, MFS can have a time and place, such as when one spouse is pursuing income-based student loan forgiveness -- or when one spouse suspects tax fraud. (Never sign an MFJ return if you know your spouse is up to no good!) Consulting a CPA will always be your best bet to understand your specific situation.

Neptune adds: Your filing status is a financial decision, not a reflection of how aligned you are. Many couples find that discussing these options deepens financial trust. A prenup can support this process by starting the money conversation - so while taxes are likely not to be something addressed in a prenup, when tax season comes along in April, you will both be aligned on how to best make the filing decision.

Q: We’re young! Do we really need life insurance and an estate plan?

RightWise says: From an actuarial perspective, it's very rare for a person to die young. That said, should it come to pass, it can be even more tragic -- and even more complex -- for being unexpected. Preparing a will and other end-of-life documents, plus strong organization and transparency, are an act of love for those you'd leave behind. Whether a person dies young or at the end of a great run, one thing they all have in common: everyone always thinks they have more time.

Neptune adds: Not many people know this but a prenup outlines what happens to you and your partners assets in case of separation and death. Prenups will frequently include estate planning considerations: would you want assets to go to your spouse? What about to children from a prior marriage? 

Note that the prenup does not replace the purpose and utility of a will or estate plan. We recommend speaking with an estate planning attorney to understand your specific situation.

Q: I bought my house before we met. Now we’re married, and he’s paying me half the mortgage. Does he own half of my home now?

RightWise says: This one is tricky, and the exact legal frameworks depend on the state you live in. We see clients who often fall into these arrangements without ever having a real conversation about what they want and what feels fair. State laws on home ownership for married couples can be confusing and ambiguity can hurt the person you care about - or drag out expensive proceedings, if it comes to that. Order some Thai food, barrel through any uncomfortable feelings, and make sure you're on the same page. 

Discussing your options with a family law attorney is an excellent way to have guided conversations from an expert.

Neptune adds: Homeownership can bring up crucial questions when finances start to overlap. A prenup (or postnup) lets you make intentional decisions together about how you handle that house going forward. Whether you keep it separate or eventually co-own, the goal isn’t to draw a line but to create clarity that reflects how you want to live and grow as a family.

Q: Of course, we’ll never get divorced. But if we did, my spouse has six figures of student loan debt. Would I be on the hook?

RightWise says: In most cases, premarital debt remains separate and belongs to the borrower. In fact, in a divorce, you may even be able to go after joint funds that were used to pay separate debt. However, this boundary can get fuzzy where you co-sign for debt, refinance together or otherwise commingle funds.

Neptune adds: Even if any legal judgement would probably be on your side, a prenup can help reduce ambiguity and avoid future headaches. The clarity allows scenarios to go both ways where the debt lines are clearly drawn but one party can feel comfortable contributing to helping pay down debt if that’s an option discussed and aligned on. 

Discussing combining and growing your assets can be fun when entering a marriage, but don’t forget to talk about any outstanding debts as well.

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Final Thoughts: Marriage is a Team Sport, and So Is Planning

Talking about money can be emotional, but it doesn’t have to be confusing. The best financial decisions come from open communication, shared values, and smart planning tools.

At RightWise Wealth, we make it easier for couples to have big conversations about their financial values, budget and spending, investments and risk tolerance, and vision for retirement. We can lower the emotional temperature, surface important conversations, and discover cost savings and investment opportunities that could help you achieve goals like retiring earlier. We especially love working with clients who have stock compensation from their employer. Visit our website to learn more about our firm and set up time with one of our advisors.  

And as a financial concierge built for modern couples, Neptune guides couples through prenups and financial conversations. Whether you're growing your wealth or building a life together, you've already seen the value of planning. A prenup is simply one more way to plan well together.

Want to talk about what financial transparency looks like in your relationship? Start the conversation with Neptune today.