Prenups for Tech Workers With Stock Options and Equity

Why Equity Compensation Changes the Prenup Conversation for Tech Couples

The AI boom has rewritten what a tech compensation package looks like. Some researchers are fielding pay packages reported in the hundreds of millions, and companies like OpenAI, Anthropic, and SpaceX have all signaled interest in going public, a shift that could make an estimated 16,000 employees millionaires if those offerings land. That same wave has more couples talking about prenups, and a recent survey found roughly 25 percent of respondents said AI income changed how they split expenses with a partner, with 9 percent warming to the idea of a formal agreement.

Equity is different from a paycheck or a savings account, and that difference is the whole reason it deserves attention. A salary lands, gets spent or saved, and its character is easy to trace. Stock options, RSUs, and startup shares behave nothing like that. Their value swings with the company, they're tied to your continued employment, and they vest over months or years. A grant you receive today might be worth very little now and a great deal at a liquidity event, or the reverse. That timing and uncertainty is exactly what makes classifying equity messy when no one has written down a rule in advance.

The conversation itself is easier than most couples expect once they reframe it. "The initial outreach for a premarital agreement is an invitation, not a demand," says Michael C. Cotugno, Esq., Managing Partner at Neptune Legal. When one or both of you hold pre-liquidity equity at a company expected to go public or run a tender, a prenup is where the two of you decide together how that equity is treated. You're planning with each other, not preparing against each other.

How Stock Options, RSUs, and Pre-IPO Equity Work in a Prenup

Start with the vocabulary, because the terms get used loosely and they mean different things.

A stock option is the right to buy company shares at a fixed price, called the strike price, after a vesting period. If the market value climbs above your strike, you can exercise and capture the difference. Options come in two flavors: ISOs (incentive stock options), which can qualify for favorable capital gains treatment if you meet holding requirements, and NSOs (non-qualified stock options), which are taxed as ordinary income at exercise. RSUs (restricted stock units) are promises of actual shares delivered once conditions are met, usually continued employment for a set period. Unlike options, you don't pay a strike price to receive them. Founder or pre-IPO stock is equity in a private company that hasn't had a liquidity event yet, often the most valuable and the hardest to value.

Vesting is where classification gets nuanced. Most grants follow a time-based schedule, frequently a one-year cliff (nothing vests until you hit the twelve-month mark) followed by monthly or quarterly vesting over three more years. Others carry performance-based triggers tied to revenue milestones, a funding round, or an IPO. Here's the wrinkle: a grant issued before you marry that keeps vesting after the wedding straddles two periods. Part of its value reflects work you did while single, part reflects work during the marriage. Without an agreement, that split becomes a question someone has to answer later, often by formula.

A prenup lets the two of you answer it now. You can designate premarital shares, options, and founder stock as separate property. You can pre-decide how post-marriage grants are treated, and how any IPO or acquisition proceeds are handled if the partnership ends. The key is documenting everything: every current grant, every vesting schedule with its cliffs and triggers, and a clear rule for future grants that haven't been awarded yet. Standard templates routinely miss these assets, which is why specific drafting matters.

How State Default Rules Classify Equity Without an Agreement

If you don't set your own rule, your state sets one for you, and the two systems produce very different results.

Community property states (California, Texas, and seven others) generally treat equity earned during the marriage as community property, split roughly equally, regardless of whose name sits on the cap table. In California, assets acquired before marriage are separate property while assets acquired during the marriage are community property and typically divided 50/50. Equitable distribution states (New York, Massachusetts, and most others) treat vested equity acquired during the marriage as marital property subject to a fair division, which is not necessarily an equal one.

When a grant straddles the marriage, courts often reach for a time-rule or coverture formula, a fraction that apportions the grant between the marital and separate periods based on when the work happened. A prenup can replace that formula entirely with a rule you and your partner choose.

This is a national issue with state-specific mechanics. The categories are consistent across the country, but the exact formulas and definitions vary, which is one reason independent counsel licensed in your state matters so much.

A Framework for Planning Equity Together

You don't need to solve this alone or from scratch. Here's a sequence couples can follow with their attorneys and financial professionals.

Step 1: Disclose everything, openly. Full, transparent disclosure of all equity, grants, and vesting schedules between partners is the foundation. Incomplete disclosure is one of the most common reasons a court later questions an agreement. Both partners should see the complete picture.

Step 2: Decide how premarital equity and its appreciation are treated. This matters most for pre-IPO shares. Imagine one partner brings 100,000 shares into the marriage at a $20 strike, and five years later, at the IPO, those shares are worth $200 each. The premarital shares themselves may be separate, but the appreciation during the marriage is exactly the kind of thing your agreement should address directly rather than leaving open.

Step 3: Set explicit rules for post-marriage and future grants. Cover grants that haven't been awarded yet, not just what's on the books today. A tech career often means new grants every year, and an agreement that only names current holdings ages poorly.

Step 4: Plan for the events that actually change the numbers. Acquisitions, IPOs, and tender offers can turn illiquid equity into real money overnight. Deciding in advance how proceeds are handled keeps a happy event from becoming a confusing one.

Step 5: Give it time, and use independent counsel. Independent counsel for each partner is highly recommended for an enforceable prenup. Rushing a signature can raise questions about whether it was truly voluntary. Some states build in a mandatory pause: under current California law, Family Code section 1615, there must be at least seven calendar days between when a party receives the final agreement and when they sign it. Plan your timeline so signing well before the wedding is comfortable, not frantic.

For founders especially, the emotional weight here is real. "For entrepreneurs and dedicated professionals, their work is often far more than a job; it is a profound expression of their purpose and identity," says Michael C. Cotugno, Esq., Managing Partner at Neptune Legal. A well-built agreement respects that by giving both partners clarity about the thing one of them has poured years into.

Done well, the outcome isn't a winner and a loser. It's two people who understand exactly how their finances work together, with the ambiguity removed.

Working With Neptune to Address Equity in Your Prenup

Neptune manages the full process end to end. Rather than sending you to a marketplace or handing you a template, Neptune pairs you with experienced family law attorneys, CFPs, and CPAs (many with 20+ years of experience) and shepherds everything from the first conversation to the signed agreement.

Equity compensation is precisely where that matters. Classifying ISOs and NSOs correctly, tracking premarital appreciation on pre-IPO shares, and drafting language that covers future grants all take professionals who work with these structures regularly. Neptune's intake is AI-guided to handle the asset and equity disclosure cleanly, so nothing gets missed and both partners see the full picture. The prenup is delivered on a flat fee that covers both partners and two independent state-licensed family law attorneys, so each of you has your own counsel and the agreement is built to hold up.

Couples who plan together, grow together. If you and your partner hold stock options, RSUs, or startup equity, this is a good conversation to start early, and Neptune can help you have it with clarity for both of you.